"Never Evers s"

Never go back to the past and replay scenes in your head over and over again.

Never ever go back to the old self that once ruined your soul. 

Never ever believe in those lies people told you,  NEVER.

Never bring yourself as low as those people who do bad to you.

Never let your genetics determine who you are.

Never become someone whom you thought you will never be.

Never love others without loving yourself.

Never listen to your negative depressing thoughts in your head, REJECT them.

Never let the world engulf you into flames and get you internally burnt to death.

Never let anyone's judgement be the power over your future.

Never ever give up even if you are feeling super overwhelmed.

Never let your emotions be the head of your decisions or judgments.

Never do something you hate forever.

Never choose a rich life over happiness.

Never let yourself be a rebound of anyone.

Never be with someone who angers you all the time.

Never be blinded because of love.

Never think that death is the only option.

Never ignore the signs life gives you.

Never lower your standards just because you are lonely.

Never be so silly that you forgot how to love yourself.

Never hold grudges as it only ruins yourself.

Never waste your time on quarrelling with immature people.

Never become a person who is full of lies, nonsense and lastly all the shits in the world which is endless.

Imperfection

Imperfection is normal, imperfection is within each and everyone of us. We are all mostly striving hard for every day life, hoping to achieve good things or even the best. It can be really tiring at times. Especially, the perfectionism in me can sometimes cause me to be really shag or dissappointed at myself. Self-expectations are good, but too many expectations can only stress oneself and may reep bad fruits in your life. I just felt that i want to share this with you guys who are feeling weary or tired of striving.

Number 1 - You are NOT ALONE.

 Everyone has their own expectations, worries, fears and doubts. Sometimes, as humans we do forget that the competition is not among us and others, but is the fight within us that constantly battles for our lives. Because of the self-condemnation, self-doubt and enviness, we can be blinded by our true purpose for how we started this battle. For example, if you are aiming to be top in the level , but people are overtaking you and want to compete with you, you may feel the stress and dissatifaction. But trust me, it is not worth a second of your time in competiting strongly against anyone. Personally, i am a competitive individual, who aims very high once i set a goal. I realised many things ranging from studies to reputation, as long as you focused on your own journey and ONLY your own journey without looking at others, you can truly spend the wise amount of time on your goals as it can rob you from the joy during the process.

Number 2- Know yourself well and take PROPER action.

Know your body, mind and health as well as you know about your favourite idols or person.

You need to ensure that you are doing things every day life without neglecting too much of your mental and physical health. There are many cases where people are too overwhelmed by either workload at work or personal issues, they commit suicide or sink into depression. You need to know your limits, do your best to save yourself from the palms of the devil. Personally i think emphasis on personal awareness is EXTREMELY important. Without taking care of your own inner issues,usually can be a great obstruction to your goals and happiness. Therefore, understanding yourself is the primary key to succeeding in life.

Number 3- importance of TRULY accepting imperfections exists in our life like its no big deal.

It is important you tell yourself from time to time, " it is okay, to fail this time.", "It is okay not to be the best" , "It is okay if I am different from others" , "It is okay to forgive myself". Only when you accept the outcome, only then you can really focus on your future goals and forget the pasts. Just like a very young child, by nature they believe in the good in life, they have a simple and forgiving mindset towards themselves. After they burst into tears out of sadness or anger, they can be happy and alright the very next moment. We need to learn to contain a child-like faith, a faith that brings in much more happiness and hope in life.

Number 4- Keep CALM and let go of whatever that is hindering your growth.
Failures and setbacks might make one doubt their skills and ability, or their worth. But, not to forget that you cannot control the people or environment that you are in. But, YOU CAN control your mind, emotions and thoughts as long as you allow to train yourself to take PROPER control. nobody can tell you WHO you are as a person or WHAT is within you. Let me share with you a simple thought that helps me think positively, " Over time, do those negative, temporary situations matter?" What i usually do is to let everything that is unbeneficial to not steal my joy. Nowadays, as each new trial comes ahead,  the time i dwell on negative thoughts or worries keeps on decreasing. It is important to cultivate a habit of positive lifestyle.

I know it can be hard at times to get through trials, but as you feed yourself with positivity, love and joy, many things in you life can fall into place! It just takes time and effort to grow yourself as a person and fill yourself up again! Remember that things can get tougher, but YOU my friend, can GET STRONGER! I believe in all of you readers. You are much more capable and stronger than you ever know.

Hope you guys find this helpful! Lots of love! xo

Love in Christ

Your love changes me inside out, you love gives me peace and hope.

You shower me with endless grace, a love that cannot ever be compared.

You loved us so much that you sacrificed your only Son, and give us chances to rest in your loving embrace.

You calm my fears, bring me out of the darkness and took me out of bondages.

How loved I am, that I am righteous not by self obedience, but by Jesus' Obendience.

You gave me the best gift, which is to rest and cast all my cares upon you, giving me overflowing favour and grace.

You provides lasting freedom from my sins, and received undeserving love by knowing that i am righteousness of God in Christ.

You helped me out from the battle of my mind, putting all condemning thoughts out of my head.

You washed me clean and I am cleansed forever.

You constantly bless with me people, opportunities and save me from bad circumstances.

You made me shine like never before, and replace bitterness with gloriousness and grace.

You are the lover of my soul, the hiding place whenever I am feeling down.

I am eternally transformed by your grace, always looking towards You and not my circumstances nor people.

Nothing is like the love i experienced in Christ, it is the best thing that ever happened to me.

Senerity

Senerity within a person can be acquired when...

You learn how to deal stress and anxiety through experiences that taught you.

You are able to sleep in peace knowing you have a clear conscience.

You forgive others and forgive yourself.

Not swallowing the poison which you drank in it your own will.

You are patient and taking actions on the things you want to achieve.

You are more aware of yourself and others' actions.

You know it is okay to rest and give yourself a short break from things in life.

You take action more than you speak.

You know what are your top priorities.

You be yourself, and love yourself and others.

You do not compete with others.

You focus on peace and harmony, not focus on your pride.

You are open-minded and understanding towards different people.

You know you have done your best and have no regrets.

You learn from each lessons that life taught you, so you will not repeat the cycle.

You learn to feed on your wisdom and not pride.

You stay away from people who are negative and drains you out.

You choose your close friends wisely.

You do not overthink, use your mind instead of your heart thus you will be able to see thing more logically.

You learn to reflect upon your actions and change your bad habits and improve own flaws.

You do not allow excuses to take charge of the important things in life.

You are not bitter and easily angered.

You are confident in yourself.

You are wise enough to let go of the pasts.

You focus on the present and things that matter.

You do not gossip and spread rumours.

You are able to control your mind and train yourself to think positively.

You really know your worth, and stop pleasing others.

You pray and have faith that things will work out.

You do not let emotions overtake your intellectual.

You learn how to treat others with respect.

You are not impulsive and trigger your loved ones to be angered.

You know how to be a person and treat people with humility.

You do not wish others bad.

You focus on being a rightful person instead of criticizing others.

You look yourself in the mirror before judging others.

You learn how to give yourself and others time to grow and figure out.

You know your stand and know how to be assertive.

You know that you are precious, you are loved.

"You are the living vine"

"You are the living vine, you are my strength.

You supply me with never ending goodness, you shaped and grow me.

You never gave up on me, and fight for my "battles" when im "dry".

You cleanse me deep, you bring life into me.

You are the vine that flows in me, you provide me with consistent care.

You lift me up, you make me grow stronger each time.

You allow me to bear fruits, you make it effortless for me.

You are the nutrients to my life, the key to my life.

You showed me my purpose, you lead me the way.

You give me hope,  and i put my entire trust in you.

You give me health, you allow me to mature and bear good fruits.

You are intertwined with me, your unconditional ways are eternal.

You are love, you are the lover of my soul.

Your name is Jesus. "

Be strong

Our What ifs...

"What if I am really nothing and useless like what that person says about me?"

"What if things go wrong and everything crumbles down and my soul gets broken?"

"What if I get cancer like how my father did and die at a young age?"

"What if my qualifications aren't enough for me to get a good job?"

"What if I am not able to survive this semester at school?

"What if I am not good enough and everyone hates me?"

"What if people keep taking advantage of my kindness?"

In your heads..

"I am really useless!"

"I am a hopeless person! Why am i even on this planet?"

"I am ugly, no one likes me."

"I am not good enough, I will never be."

"I can't take it anymore, it is killing me."

"Why do i deserve this treatment? why am i born this way?"

Person A: 

Decides to dwell on the troubles and negative thoughts. He dives into negative emotions, shuts himself up and builds walls around himself. As time passes, he gets into the cycle of defeated lifestyle. Every day living with self-absorbed mindset,self-doubt, anxiety and depression. But he

has yet to know clearly, he not only hurts himself, but people around him who cares for him.

[A form of self-righteousness]

Person B:

Gets out of the negative thoughts after awhile, surrounds herself with positive people, finds solutions to the problems. Never gives up on being positive and maintains a healthy level of faith in humanity. She continues to be herself and be hopeful. She focuses on things that matter and worthy of her time. Nothing can stop her from being empathetic, kind, generous and loving to others.

[Strong soul]

Moral of the story:
No matter how many times you fall, stand up boldly and fight against your weaknesses and problems. Regardless of hardships, failures and disappointments, the BIGGEST mistake you can ever do to yourself is giving up on life and humanity. Once you become numb, if you go deeper, it becomes harder to get out of defeated life. And you know what makes you? You may become one of the person you once hated. They may be heartless, unkind, silly and have no life. Once you given up on life and people, you start to go on the wrong path they went through. You will be self-absorbed all day long, self-centred and hurt people around who love and cares for you. Thus, be wise on your decision making, love yourself enough to let go of those negative pasts and thoughts. Lastly, note that only when you love yourself enough, then you are able to love others wholly.

A psalm of David.

1 The LORD is my shepherd, I lack nothing. 

2 He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, 

3 he refreshes my soul. He guides me along the right paths for his name’s sake. 

4 Even though I walk through the darkest valley,I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. 

5 You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows.

6 Surely your goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever.

"Its time to STOP saying next time"

Its time to stop saying next time, its time to stop saying tomorrow.
Wake up from those dreamy restless days, start doing something beneficial.
Time waits for no one, only YOU can make a difference in your life.
Stop pondering about useless things, stop thinking of the past.
Strengthen your heart, strengthen your mind through different ways.
Go read some inspirational books, listen to your favourite music.
Be in tune with worldly affairs, go take up an activity which grows you.
Do the things you love, explore more things and you'll find out more about yourself.
Go do something productive , make your days count.
Do not neglect the little details in you life, as they all add up, and make a BIG difference in your life.
Start challenging yourself for GREATER things, and reach for your dreams.
If you do not reach the moon, at least you'll land among the stars.
Be proactive, be initiative in many things you do and STOP waiting for it to happen.
Go tell a loved one how much you love them, show it to them through your ways.
Stop being stubborn and egoistic, be gentle and treat everyone with humility.
Spend time with people who grows you, connects with you and genuinely loves you.
Be who you are, learn how to love yourself first before loving others.
Go make someone smile, make a difference in someone's life.
Be a good example, be an inspiration, be a useful person.
Be a great cheer leader, be an awesome partner, be the best daughter you can ever be.
No one knows when is the last day on earth for each and everyone of us.
Cherish life, start acting and start being the best version of yourself my friend.
There will be no room for regrets, as long as you start now.
You own your own remote control, your future is in YOUR hands.

Day out chilling at an awesome cafe- 21.09.16

Don't you just have days where you will just be content with life just by sitting down at a great cafe with a cozy environment and vibes you love, sipping a caramel macchiato, reading a story book and pondering about many things? It could be a really awesome past memory, dreaming about the things you would like to have, or doing some reflections/planning for your life. Well, I am the type of cafe person to do all that. Sometimes, i love time alone at a cafe, just so that you have personal space and time to relax and replenish you energy from work, or perhaps maybe also read some amazing books/articles online which inspire you and motivates you in life. You can just be in your own world of thoughts, away from the hustle and bustle, and have lots of peace and comfort appreciating the time you have to wind down yourself. I love personal time, its just making time for yourself and seriously think about life , at the same time, doing some self-improvement. 

 Yesterday, I finally had a great catch up session with one of my best friend(aka soulmate) , amidst her very busy schedule. We went to an awesome cafe called D'good cafe and I really loved the environment as it had a really cozy feeling, and pretty decorations hanging around the place. What i really love about the cafe is that it is a christian cafe with nice soothing worship songs, a seemingly quiet environment(as compared to some other cafes) and alternative places to chill in the cafe. To be honest, it is a really suitable place for people who loves peace and quietness. As you can see from the first solo picture of me, there is even a really pretty swing with pillows on it. In front there is also actually a wide full transparent glass for you to look outside and admire the skies and some greenery. It was indeed a great choice of place for cafe lovers to chill.

Anyways, I just love having friends around me who really sincerely wishes me well,connects with me well and can just talk to me about anything in the world. A friend whom i can trust and genuinely treats me, loving and accepting the way i am and genuinely loves is hard to find. Especially finding a friend who gets me and is similar in many sense. Enjoy heart to heart talks and chilling at cafes with this babe, am really grateful for true friends God put into my life. Just really makes my day woohoo
So this comes to an end of the blog post, thanks for reading and follow me if you wna keep up with my updates xx ;)

11.09.16-Recent thoughts & attending HOGC service

Heyy guys! This is going be my very first blog post and I am very excited to share my awesome memories and experience:) Hope you guys love reading it! So I am going to write on the amazing grace which brought me back to enlightenment with the power of the words of Jesus!

 11 september was an emotional day at church for me. During the past recent weeks before holidays started, i had been really worn out by projects at school. I did not realise the time spent with God was getting lesser and lesser, to the point i felt like i was on my own, having my own self-righteousness while dealing with daily activities. At some point this year, i also had been dragged into a spiral of thoughts and was also extremely drained by certain issues that also pulled me away from God, which thus brought my growth with God spiritually to a halt. It was relating to a toxic relation that i had went through. I was just hopeless and really distracted. I could not even focus on my goals and I was close to being spiritually dead. Just when I was at my breaking point God spoke to me.(YASS PTL ikr) I saw a post that really answered to my issue and at that very moment, i thought " yes definitely it must be Jesus!" It was a really long post, from a christian page. I then prayed to God for more answers. On the very day, my mum also talked to me. Her words really gave a double confirmation to my decision. I was somewhat back to my usual self some time after, as i have gotten out of that dark hole that leads to no where. God speaks to us through people many a times, we just have to notice that God does things in ways that make sense and when the least we know. I was really really thankful for God. In my heart i was like " omg God i know you are always there hearing me!" (HAHAHAH) God does really speak to us in his special ways! haha ohhh yeah anywaysss, back to my main point!

I was actually invited by my beloved friend to her church named Heart Of God church (HOGC). She said there was a rare version of a lengendary video in the service which is going to bless me greatly. The title of the sharing is "Journey of A Dream". Just by looking at the title, like woww who is gonna miss that! i can't miss that amazing sermon! hahaha.

As i went, indeed it was a really awesome and super anointed sermon! I really needed it :) It was about the process you would have to go through to reach your dreams. The first part to the journey of a dream is the BIRTH of a dream. For every birth of a dream, a dream you want to fufill, it means that you will definitely go through a DELAY in the process. It may be some factors such as the lack of ideas, manpower or resources etc. It may also be other struggles or difficulties in life, that you have to deal with hence the delaying of the process.

Besides the delaying, depending on how things turned out to be, you will reach to a certain stage where all motivation, hope and strength are just gone. Hence, you come to the stage on the DEATH of the dream. You feel powerless over your situation. It seems like nothing could help to improve the situation. Thoughts in your head start to appear "Im just overconfident", " I am useless" , " I want to give up right now" , " I had enough" , "I am just not enough, i am nothing!" . When you feel like everything is over, it is NOT, when you believe in God. Pastor preached on this chapter Genesis 37 in the bible where Joseph was hated by his eleven brothers due to the their father's favourtism towards him.

Genesis 37
6 He said to them, “Listen to this dream I had: 7 We were binding sheaves of grain out in the field when suddenly my sheaf rose and stood upright, while your sheaves gathered around mine and bowed down to it.”

8 His brothers said to him, “Do you intend to reign over us? Will you actually rule us?” And they hated him all the more because of his dream and what he had said."

19 “Here comes that dreamer!” they said to each other. 20 “Come now, let’s kill him and throw him into one of these cisterns and say that a ferocious animal devoured him. Then we’ll see what comes of his dreams.”

Joseph had dreams as a teen one of which was believing that one day his entire family would bow down to him.(The boyish dreams of a young Joseph) However, he is a person full of integrity with a heart to serve, and does things that pleases Jacob, his father and also God, the heavenly father.
His brothers hatred towards him created some trouble, delaying his growth in the process as they actually despised him and initially put him into the well to leave him there starving to death. But they
changed their mind and made him into a slave, selling him to a band of traders. He was then also accused to be a rapist and was sent to prison for many years. He was not only a slave, but also a prisoner. This made his future seemed so bleak. It was the DEATH of his dreams.

So here comes the amazing miracle for Joseph...[RESSURRECTION of a dream]

However, our almighty God of course, blessed him with a good outcome. There was a famine, but he managed to save his entire family because of his position. He was made second in command over all Eygpt. Isnt it so awesome? Indeed a blessing in disguise. Without God, he wouldnt have had made it so far after being in such a hopeless state becuase of his jealousy and ill-character brothers. This comes to show that God will surely bless you abundantly if you have a good heart, kind and pure, even though your dreams may be alittle far off.

"So Joseph found favor in his sight, and served him. Then he made him overseer of his house, and all that he had he put under his authority. So it was, from the time that he had made him overseer of his house and all that he had, that the LORD blessed the Egyptian's house for Joseph's sake; and the blessing of the LORD was on all that he had in the house and in the field." (Gen. 39:4-5) 

Pastor from HOGC also did share about how he and the other pastor had a dream to build up a church and the entire process from the beginning of when they had from the starting (BIRTH) of this dream to the ressurrection of the dream. The video is just so so touching and amazing. They started off with a small group of children ,youths and adults in their groups respectively. They managed to slowly build the church and after a few years, it grew to about 100 over people at the main service itself. Subsequently, it kept on increasing too. However, one day after service, an accident occurred to two of the kids from church after service while they were on the way home. They unfortunately passed away and one of them even passed away in the arms of one of the pastor.( yess.. it was really sad)  Both pastors had to hold funerals for two of the kids and counsel families from both sides.(IKR) It was a very tough period for them. Parents then came to them saying, "How can i trust this God when I cannot be secure with this church anymore?" Then people start leaving and stopped believing. But why? why must it be at that very moment near the church after service? Sometimes.. I do wonder too, why certain things happened the way it did. 
But the bible says..

Proverbs 3:5

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding;

They did not give up on hope!!! They could have just given up on the church and followed the paths of the unbelievers. With such a tough period like this, they managed to pull through and with God's grace, little did they know, the church slowly grew to a few hundreds, a thousand plus, and thus currently now over 3000 people are attending the church service! WOW really WOW.  Its just God's blessings that lead to the growth and continuation of the church. Many churches are currently expanding too and well all glory to Jesus!!!

 The power in the house of God was so strong that i really felt a blast of emotions at one go that day. Because... I was reminded how i was pulled out of depressing thoughts and a series of anxiety attacks from the first time i attended church,(btw im from New Creation Church) when i was completely healed of the toxic emotions in my body after my pastor, Pastor Joseph Prince prayed during the sermon and I had never supported Christianity. But one thing's for sure, you'll never know until you experienced a It was the first time, i knew this was it. God felt so real. I do not have any believe in any God before that until I felt it myrself. My body felt amazing just after that two hour service. I was very neutral, but i just felt myself changed from that day onwards. I did not have thoughts of believing till i actually felt that difference in me. It was a kind of peace... the peace that can only be felt with Jesus. Now, i can't imagine a life without Him. ;'))

Thus this comes to a conclusion! No matter what we face, it is always the attitude. Your response will determine what holds for you even if the situation may seem hopeless. We have to learn to be strong, to get back our dreams and really hold on to them.This is the power of true FAITH. Of course, if you really want that dream, make sure to pray about it to understand what God has really instored for you. Hence i learnt this phrase from Pastor "It is about God's dream, it is about the dream of others." When you help others(of course not to neglect yourself too), God will turn around to make your dreams come alive!" God is indeed a fair God. Thus dream is our HOPE, dream is our LIFE. :)